Questions
by Oldposter
Summary: Natsu is having trouble letting the events of the war against Alvarez go, and is now pushing the people he wishes to protect away from him. sorry bad at summaries. nalu eventually. (not my picture)


It was peaceful. Looking around I saw nothing but an empty beautiful forest grotto. The trees were old, ancient, and wise. A whistling breeze came from behind me, I turned to see a giant old oak, captivating, looking over all of the younger trees and guiding them. At the base of the old oak, sat a man. A man I wanted to see again. For answers. But feared.

"Natsu."

I started to shake, while the memories started to flow through me. My heart beat rising every second that passed between us.

"I hope you can find me. Natsu." He gave me a smile, soft and kind, and filled with hope.

But it terrified me.

* * *

I sat up, covered in sweat, shaking. This one was shorter than the others. I thought to myself before looking outside. The moon was setting below the horizon, no longer being outshined by the moon, while the stars twinkled brightly, quite similar to the shining, twinkling light of the sun through the old oak tree from the dream. I felt movement next to me, snapping me back to reality, turning my head to see Happy curling up to me, most likely for my heat.

Looking down at my shaking hands, I tried I couldn't get the image of that man out of my mind. I know he's dead but it felt too real. The words and his face.

I layed back down, trying to fall back to sleep. But failing miserably. Staring up at my ceiling, for what felt like hours, but was most likely only a few minutes, my mind started to wonder back to the memories of the war. The pain I could hear from everyone. The cutting of flesh, the breaking of bones.

Tears now rolled down my face. Stunned, I lifted my hand to my face to wipe the salty water away from my face. I didn't deserve crying. I wasn't the one to suffer.

Rage started to fill inside me. Deciding that it would be better to go and get some fresh air. Not wanting him to worry, I coved Happy up in the blanket replacing my now missing body heat, hoping he doesn't wake up to see me gone.

Grabbing my scarf, I walked out of my house to a clearing nearby. Looking up I noticed a constellation that Lucy told me about on our way back from a job once. She told me that it was a dragon of sorts, and that he would fight against gods and giants if he was required. "Draco."

Sitting down on a rock that laid still at the edge of the clearing overlooking a cliff above Magnolia. Judging by the way the air felt there was still a few hours before dawn. So I sat there waiting for dawn to come, pondering about any little petty thing that would come to mind. All worthless fro me to think about, for someone who is different than everyone.

* * *

Hours flew by, and soon the sky was being filled with colours of pink and orange, dancing together fighting off the darkness that's dominating the sky. I watched the fight between them till the sun was gleaming above the town.

I walked back to my home, with Happy still snoozing in a ball. Not wanting to wake him up from his sleep I went to the bathroom to wash my face avoiding my reflection in the mirror, not wanting to see how bad I looked. I turned on the tap washed my face and brushed my teeth before I grabbed my typical one sleeved shirt. Giving it a smell test. It was fine but not clean. "Eh. It'll be fine for one more day."

Walking over to happy I picked him up letting him sleep while we walked to the guild hall, with an added benefit of keeping him to the guild Happy starte to stir in my arms, waking up ever so slowly. His eyes opened, slightly confused out our surroundings "Hey buddy, we're just halfway to the guild."

"Huh? Why didn't you wake me up when you left?"

"I couldn't be bothered." I replied laconically, not looking at him while he started flying out of my arms to be besides me instead. We traveled quietly till we were just in front of the guild, Happy flew in front of my face. Staring. "What?"

"You smell bad. When did you shower last?"

"I don't know. A week." He stayed in front of me, his facial expression changing to worry.

"Are you okay Natsu? You've been like this for the past month. Is something bothering you? Is it about the war? Lucy? Igne-"

"Drop it happy."

"But I'm worried. You don't seem like yourself."

"And what's that? A carefree, dence idiot who is oblivious to his surroundings and who they are?" Happy jumped at my words, looked a little hurt at my reaction, movies out of my way and moved back to my side and followed me into the inside happy flew straight to Carla, while I went to the bar hoping for some peace and quiet.

"Oh Natsu? Your here early. What's the special occasion?" I turned to look at Mira who had the same smile she always does.

Completely ignoring her reaction I looked at her with an emotionless face."Can I have a beer Mira?"

Taken back by my words, she blinks, once then twice, releasing what I'm asking for this early in the morning. "I dont think thats a good-"

Giving her a look telling her not to push me, I put the money on the counter looking at the wall, resting my face in my hands. Hearing Mira getting my drink for me, gland she didn't push the situation further.

I sat there listening to everyone around, me hearing the same old same old, with no new or interesting conversations between the members. I started to drink my beer just waiting for it to numb my body.

* * *

A few hours and three drinks later, I heard the front doors of the guild open. Turning my head to see who it was, I saw Lucy entering with her bright smiling face. I turned away before she could see my face, not wanting her to see me like this. All sad and shit.

"Oh Lucy! Can you please come here a second?" I heard Mira call Lucy over curious, I tried to eavesdrop their conversation, but for some reason I couldn't hear a word. Didn't want to show my interest, I continued to look at a wall, pretending that i didn't care about what Mira wanted to ask or maybe tell Lucy.

"Okay. Thanks Mira I'm on it." Now looking at the two of them, I saw a piece of paper in Mira's hands bring scrunched up. I guess she really didn't want anyone to hear.

Sensing my stare, I guess. Lucy turned to face me, gave me a cheerful smile. "Good morning Natsu."

"Morning." I replied dryly taking another sip of my beer, turning away from her.

"Natsu, you look tired. Did you sleep last night?"

"Yes."

"For how long?"

I sat in silence. Then I stood up. And started to walk.

"Where are you going Natsu?"

"Home."

"What? Why?" Ignoring Lucy's question, I walked right out of the guild.

And I went for a walk.

* * *

 **Hi thank you very much for reading! this is something I've had in my mind for a while, so I thought that I would share it.**

 **PLEASE GIVE ME ALL THE HARSH JUDGMENT.  
**


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